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Life As-Pland

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Hello!

I'm Debs, and you've found my little corner of the internet

I am a happily married mum of three.

Our house is home to me, my husband, three children and a huge variety of special educational needs and disabilities (ranging from severe visual impairment to autism, from speech and communication issues to dyspraxia and from osteoarthritis to vertigo). It's also home to one very nutty dog who fits in perfectly.

Having children with SEND has definitely given me a huge bag of tools to help me get back up, time and time again. Tools to help me keep the plates spinning and tools to help me know when I need to focus on self care.

I try to keep it real, I don't pretend I have the perfect Instagrammable home life, work/life balance or eating habits. Like you, I have good days and bad days.

Days when motivation comes easily and days when just getting out of bed is an achievement.

Days when anyone could pop round and I would be delighted to see them, and others when my house is in need of a bit of attention so unexpected drop ins leave me feeling overwhelmed.

Life isn't perfect for anyone but I can help you find that balance so the bad days don't outweigh the good ones.

Life is never ever dull!



I hope you enjoy reading my pearls of wisdom, please
feel free to leave your comments and thoughts.

Debs x

Happy Clients Have Said...

Latest Pearls of Wisdom

Recent Pearls of Wisdom

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4 months ago

Life AsPland

We're beyond excited to introduce you to KinToa, a magazine that's not just pages but a heartfelt journey. It's where the resilience of 'Kin' meets the Maori spirit of 'Toa', meaning warrior. KinToa is crafted for and by SEND parent carers, infused with real stories and lived experiences.

This isn't about fleeting comforts like hand massages at meetings. KinToa is about deep, meaningful support, shared laughter, and inspirations drawn from our own lives. We're here to empower with knowledge, unite in solidarity, and brighten your days with genuine smiles.

And now, we invite YOU to join us from the start. Sign up to be the first to hear about our launch! Get exclusive early insights, a glimpse of our inspiring content, and much more.

👉 Embark on this journey with us. Be part of a community where every story resonates, every challenge is acknowledged, and every parent carer feels a sense of belonging.

Get in touch if you would like to contribute or have any ideas or suggestions that would help you as a parent carer.

lifeaspland.com/kintoa/ (or link in bio)

#kintoa #sendparenting #RealStories #livedexperience #StrongerTogether #sendcommunity #magazinelaunch #JoinTheMovement

And a huge thanks to Natalie Trice for giving me the support and encouragement to do this.
... See MoreSee Less

Were beyond excited to introduce you to KinToa, a magazine thats not just pages but a heartfelt journey. Its where the resilience of Kin meets the Maori spirit of Toa, meaning warrior. KinToa is crafted for and by SEND parent carers, infused with real stories and lived experiences. 

This isnt about fleeting comforts like hand massages at meetings. KinToa is about deep, meaningful support, shared laughter, and inspirations drawn from our own lives. Were here to empower with knowledge, unite in solidarity, and brighten your days with genuine smiles. 

And now, we invite YOU to join us from the start. Sign up to be the first to hear about our launch! Get exclusive early insights, a glimpse of our inspiring content, and much more.

👉 Embark on this journey with us. Be part of a community where every story resonates, every challenge is acknowledged, and every parent carer feels a sense of belonging.

Get in touch if you would like to contribute or have any ideas or suggestions that would help you as a parent carer.

https://lifeaspland.com/kintoa/ (or link in bio)

#KinToa #SENDParenting #RealStories #LivedExperience #StrongerTogether #SENDCommunity #MagazineLaunch #JoinTheMovement 

And a huge thanks to Natalie Trice for giving me the support and encouragement to do this.

Comment on Facebook We're beyond excited...

👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏

Wooppp xxx

Natalie Trice it didn’t tag you in the post for some reason x

4 months ago

Life AsPland

“I know I shouldn’t be nibbling this mum, but it’s mint and I really like it!”

Negative side - need to resolve the issue as they shouldn’t eat more than a few leaves a day.

Positive side- he has amazing breath!
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“I know I shouldn’t be nibbling this mum, but it’s mint and I really like it!”

Negative side - need  to resolve the issue as they shouldn’t eat more than a few leaves a day. 

Positive side- he has amazing breath!

4 months ago

Life AsPland

Having a base is really helpful when there is a group of you but if you need a meeting point when you first get there, we highly recommend using our merchandise stall. It has a large flag near it and although it gets busy, there is always space to stand and wait for friends.

If you want a "what if we lose you" space once you're inside, then head to the bar. This year the bar is in the centre of the field, with seating and it will be a safe space to wait until your friends find you.

We do have a lost child spot near the first aid but to avoid that getting too busy, if you are just waiting for friends or know they are going to be back after a sing song, then head to the merchandise stall or bar area.
... See MoreSee Less

4 months ago

Life AsPland

You can never have too”too many” pens. Or at least that is what I have told my husband.

I love them. I love my fountain pens, they make me feel like a grown up but at the same time, lots of notebooks don’t like fountain pens and ink.

I love fineliners and midliners in a huge variety of colours but as someone who doesn’t use them to colour, I have a large collection of pale yellow and other pastel shades that are useless for writing.

I love gel pens, be they the 99p pack from B&M or the more expensive brands from Hobbycraft.

I love highlighters, but why oh why do some brands make them so dark?

I love pencils, be they the humble HB or a colour selection. As I bullet journal, I have found coloured pencils to be the best option for drawing lines in there as no chance of smudging as you move the ruler.

However, I have yet to find a rollerball I like.

What about you? Tell me your favourite pens. Tell me what you dislike in pens. I love finding new brands and trying alternative collections.

#bulletjournal #fineliners #fountainpens #fountainpenaddict #highlighters #bujojunkies #pencil #pencollection
... See MoreSee Less

You can never have too”too many” pens. Or at least that is what I have told my husband.

I love them.  I love my fountain pens, they make me feel like a grown up but at the same time, lots of notebooks don’t like fountain pens and ink.

I love fineliners and midliners in a huge variety of colours but as someone who doesn’t use them to colour, I have a large collection of pale yellow and other pastel shades that are useless for writing.

I love gel pens, be they the 99p pack from B&M or the more expensive brands from Hobbycraft.

I love highlighters, but why oh why do some brands make them so dark?

I love pencils, be they the humble HB or a colour selection.  As I bullet journal, I have found coloured pencils to be the best option for drawing lines in there as no chance of smudging as you move the ruler.

However, I have yet to find a rollerball I like. 

What about you?  Tell me your favourite pens.  Tell me what you dislike in pens. I love finding new brands and trying alternative collections.

#bulletjournal #fineliners #fountainpens #fountainpenaddict #highlighters #bujojunkies #pencil #pencollection

Comment on Facebook You can never have ...

I’m with you there!! I love a foundation pen too, have you tried the Pilot V Pen? xx

School has given me a phobia of fountain pens! We had to use them, and my dyspraxic pen grip meant I was just constantly covered in ink and getting told off for making a mess in my book 🙃 My current favourite writing pen is a Sharpie gel but I do a lot of writing at work so time will tell if it stands the test of time 😂 Pastel highlighters are my fave

I love Gel Pens 😍

Yep, I like a pen too. ✍🏿 I like to use a fountain pen for birthday cards, but some cards don’t like the ink, it just smudges so my current ‘favourite’ is a purple ball point pen ☺️

I dislike the fact I have accumulated so many and can Only Use One At A Time lol

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4 months ago

Life AsPland

I’ll just help you load the dishwasher shall I?

This puppy is into everything! Especially the things he shouldn’t be in to.

We’ve bought a metal crate today as the beautiful red canvas one was destroyed during a car journey 🙄

And now my YouTube recommendations are all dog related rather than business or planners! I need to work on getting that back to the lovely selection it used to be.

But he is also very very cute and treats me like a returning hero when I’ve been out of the room for 5 minutes ❤️

#labradoodle #puppylove #puppychaos
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I’ll just help you load the dishwasher shall I?

This puppy is into everything! Especially the things he shouldn’t be in to.

We’ve bought a metal crate today as the beautiful red canvas one was destroyed during a car journey 🙄 

And now my YouTube recommendations are all dog related rather than business or planners! I need to work on getting that back to the lovely selection it used to be. 

But he is also very very cute and treats me like a returning hero when I’ve been out of the room for 5 minutes ❤️

#labradoodle #puppylove #puppychaos

4 months ago

Life AsPland

My youngest had to resit his English GCSE for 2nd time. He is blind & autistic. His 1st exam came as he developed epilepsy and had his first few seizure a week or so before. Then the board lost his papers for months.

His 2nd one was a mess because the board only sent part of the paper in Braille!

But he resat again before Christmas and everything was there, his epilepsy was under control. Today he has received his results - he passed and is absolutely on cloud 9. #NeverGiveUp #proudmum
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My youngest had to resit his English GCSE for 2nd time. He is blind & autistic. His 1st exam came as he developed epilepsy and had his first few seizure a week or so before. Then the board lost his papers for months. 

His 2nd one was a mess because the board only sent part of the paper in Braille! 

But he resat again before Christmas and everything was there, his epilepsy was under control.  Today he has received his results - he passed and is absolutely on cloud 9. #NeverGiveUp #proudmum

Comment on Facebook My youngest had to ...

True resilience there! Well done J xx

I bet as Mum you are feeling really proud aswell! Congratulations to your youngest and to you all!

Very well done!

So proud of you Jamie ❤️

Fantastic news well done xxx

Amazing!! Well done J ⭐️ 👏🏼

Brilliant!!!!!!!!!!!

View more comments

4 months ago

Life AsPland

A diagnosis brings a spectrum of emotions, each a valid and integral part of our journey.

So much is written about how to get a diagnosis; what the criteria is for a diagnosis and what to do when you don’t get one but little is written about how it feels to get the diagnosis.

As a family, we’ve collected many a variety of diagnosis along our travels. You would think that, by now, we would be pretty used to being handed a new label/diganosis and getting on with it; you would think that we would be hardened to the experience.

We're not. A new diagnosis may bring some relief because a diagnosis is often one of the tick boxes required for support, but it can also bring a spectrum of other emotions

What happens the days after the diagnosis? I've written about this over on my blog. lifeaspland.com/the-day-after-the-diagnosis/
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A diagnosis brings a spectrum of emotions, each a valid and integral part of our journey.

So much is written about how to get a diagnosis; what the criteria is for a diagnosis and what to do when you don’t get one but little is written about how it feels to get the diagnosis.

As a family, we’ve collected many a variety of diagnosis along our travels. You would think that, by now, we would be pretty used to being handed a new label/diganosis and getting on with it; you would think that we would be hardened to the experience.  

Were not.  A new diagnosis may bring some relief because a diagnosis is often one of the tick boxes required for support, but it can also bring a spectrum of other emotions

What happens the days after the diagnosis?  Ive written about this over on my blog.  https://lifeaspland.com/the-day-after-the-diagnosis/

Comment on Facebook A diagnosis brings a...

Wow! Gosh that makes so much sense, having just come through that situation. Hope you are ok? X

4 months ago

Life AsPland

Are you promising yourself this is the year you will get on top of all that paperwork. As a parent carer, I know how the little piles of paperwork can quickly become mountains. I know the hours I can waste trying to find that one piece of paper I need.

Over the years I have found lots of tips and tricks to help get it organised but also how to stay on top of it once you have sorted it. We all have days where we go for it and file like a ninja! But then we don't have strategies to keep it that way.

This guide offers you some tips to do just that. From someone with three children with SEND, these tips mean I spend less time searching for paperwork and as a result, my stress levels get a break too.

Go to lifeaspland.com/paperwork-guide/ to download the guide
... See MoreSee Less

Are you promising yourself  this is the year  you will get on top of all that paperwork.  As a parent carer, I know how the little piles of paperwork can quickly become mountains.  I know the hours I can waste trying to find that one piece of paper I need.  

Over the years I have found lots of tips and tricks to help get it organised but also how to stay on top of it once you have sorted it.  We all have days where we go for it and file like a ninja!  But then we dont have strategies to keep it that way.  

This guide offers you some tips to do just that.  From someone with three children with SEND, these tips mean I spend less time searching for paperwork and as a result, my stress levels get a break too.

Go to https://lifeaspland.com/paperwork-guide/ to download the guide

4 months ago

Life AsPland

It takes real planning to organise this kind of chaos. - Mel Odom

Is it just me who saw this quote and knew it was meant for me? Without planning, the chaos of three children with SEND, a puppy, an inclusive festival and a business to run would have left me on my ar&e a long time ago.

Sunday evening is planning time for me, looking at calendars, appointments and to do lists, and working out how it will all get done.

Sometimes it doesn't - because life happens - but that's ok, I add them back to the list next Sunday when I plan again. Having a little plan, even if it is only "on Monday I will do x" and not a specific "on Monday at 11am, I will do x for 30 minutes" helps me start Monday without total dread.

Your diary will tell you how many appointments or meetings you have, prioritise those (adding in travel time where needed) and then just try to plan some of your tasks around it.

Comment below and let me know if you do it, or perhaps you plan on a different day - what are your top tips?
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It takes real planning to organise this kind of chaos.  - Mel Odom

Is it just me who saw this quote and knew it was meant for me?  Without planning, the chaos of three children with SEND, a puppy, an inclusive festival and a business to run would have left me on my ar&e a long time ago.  

Sunday evening is planning time for me, looking at calendars, appointments and to do lists, and working out how it will all get done.  

Sometimes it doesnt - because life happens - but thats ok, I add them back to the list next Sunday when I plan again.  Having a little plan, even if it is only on Monday I will do x and not a specific on Monday at 11am, I will do x for 30 minutes helps me start Monday without total dread.  

Your diary will tell you how many appointments or meetings you have, prioritise those (adding in travel time where needed) and then just try to plan some of your tasks around it.

Comment below and let me know if you do it, or perhaps you plan on a different day - what are your top tips?

5 months ago

Life AsPland

Do you have a list of things you enjoy doing? The things that cheer you up?

When you are having a sh*t day, you won't remember what makes you happy, so write a list down ready for those bad days. Yes, if we lived in an instagram world. sh*t days wouldn't exist but we live in the real world so they do.

Sit in your self care corner, grab that journal and write down all the things that make you happy. People who cheer you up, Youtube videos that cheers you up, smells that cheer you up, places that cheer you up, tastes that cheer you up.

I know watching Greg Davies tell his underwear story on the Graham Norton show, the one where Ryan Gosling struggles to breathe as he is laughing so much, is guaranteed to make me smile.

I know a visit to the beach is guaranteed to cheer me up.

I know a phone call with some friends will cheer me up or at least help me offload and move on.

I know the smell of tarmac makes me smile (obviously not something I can always find but I have been known to happily sit at temporary lights when they are laying a new road)

I know Ibiza anthems from the 90s cheer me up

I know a true crime podcast may not necessarily cheer me up but will give my brain a break.

Make a list when you are in a good place and keep adding to it as you remember more things. When we first introduced these in the house, it was highly amusing to see what the children added to theirs. "Ice cream before dinner" is still one of my favourites. Yes, I would recommend introducing the idea of "what makes me happy" lists to your children. It's a great tool for them after a bad day at school.

We call it the sh*t day list, but you could call it something like "Things that cheer me up" if you prefer.

I would love to hear if you make one and how it works for you.

#badday #parentcarerlife #specialneedsfamily #familylife #specialneedsparenting #thingsthatmakemehappy
... See MoreSee Less

Do you have a list of things you enjoy doing?  The things that cheer you up?

When you are having a sh*t day, you wont remember what makes you happy, so write a list down ready for those bad days.  Yes, if we lived in an instagram world. sh*t days wouldnt exist but we live in the real world so they do.

Sit in your self care corner, grab that journal and write down all the things that make you happy.  People who cheer you up, Youtube videos that cheers you up, smells that cheer you up, places that cheer you up, tastes that cheer you up.  

I know watching Greg Davies tell his underwear story on the Graham Norton show, the one where Ryan Gosling struggles to breathe as he is laughing so much, is guaranteed to make me smile. 

I know a visit to the beach is guaranteed to cheer me up.

I know a phone call with some friends will cheer me up or at least help me offload and move on.

I know the smell of tarmac makes me smile (obviously not something I can always find but I have been known to happily sit at temporary lights when they are laying a new road)

I know Ibiza anthems from the 90s cheer me up

I know a true crime podcast may not necessarily cheer me up but will give my brain a break.

Make a list when you are in a good place and keep adding to it as you remember more things.  When we first introduced these in the house, it was highly amusing to see what the children added to theirs.  Ice cream before dinner is still one of my favourites.  Yes, I would recommend introducing the idea of what makes me happy lists to your children.  Its a great tool for them after a bad day at school.

We call it the sh*t day list, but you could call it something like Things that cheer me up if you prefer.

I would love to hear if you make one and how it works for you.  

#badday #parentcarerlife #specialneedsfamily #familylife #specialneedsparenting #thingsthatmakemehappy

Comment on Facebook Do you have a list ...

Roy Keane videos on TikTok realllllllyyyyy cheer me up 😍😂

Twitter

Most Popular Pearls of Wisdom

  • Taking care of myself doesn't me first, it means me too - motivational quoteSelf care: Me too not Me First, by Debs Aspland Wednesday, 16th September 2020 Self care isn't about making you the number one priority and ignoring the needs of everyone around you. Self care means "me too". (1160)
  • ListsLists, Bullet Journal and Autism by Debs Aspland Wednesday, 20th January 2016 However, this week, we realised how much impact my love of lists has had on my son. (960)
  • LA-s-06Incomplete Compassion by Debs Aspland Friday, 5th June 2020 If your compassion does not include yourself, it is incompleteJack Kornfield Compassion - a strong feeling of sympathy and sadness for the suffering or bad luck of others and a wish to help them"Cambridge English Dictionary Everyone, with the exception of perhaps some psychopaths, has the ability to feel compassion towards others. Studies have shown… (701)
  • The only way you are going to have success is to have lots of failures firstFailure, then success by Debs Aspland Monday, 1st June 2020 Fear of Failure Why are we so afraid of failure? Failure means different things to different people; due to our upbringing, beliefs, values and obviously the standards we set for ourselves. Failure for one person may not be a failure for someone else. First of all, you need to really be clear about what failure… (514)
  • You're just lazyYou’re just lazy by Debs Aspland Saturday, 18th February 2017 I think I saw myself through her eyes. I was explaining about the difficulties and her response was "Debs, sorry love but I think you're just lazy, there's no excuse" (499)

Most Popular Posts

  • Self care: Me too not Me First,Taking care of myself doesn't me first, it means me too - motivational quote Wednesday, 16th September 2020 Self care isn't about making you the number one priority and ignoring the needs of everyone around you. Self care means "me too". (1160)
  • Lists, Bullet Journal and AutismLists Wednesday, 20th January 2016 However, this week, we realised how much impact my love of lists has had on my son. (960)
  • Incomplete CompassionLA-s-06 Friday, 5th June 2020 If your compassion does not include yourself, it is incompleteJack Kornfield Compassion - a strong feeling of sympathy and sadness for the suffering or bad luck of others and a wish to help them"Cambridge English Dictionary Everyone, with the exception of perhaps some psychopaths, has the ability to feel compassion towards others. Studies have shown… (701)
  • Failure, then successThe only way you are going to have success is to have lots of failures first Monday, 1st June 2020 Fear of Failure Why are we so afraid of failure? Failure means different things to different people; due to our upbringing, beliefs, values and obviously the standards we set for ourselves. Failure for one person may not be a failure for someone else. First of all, you need to really be clear about what failure… (514)
  • You’re just lazyYou're just lazy Saturday, 18th February 2017 I think I saw myself through her eyes. I was explaining about the difficulties and her response was "Debs, sorry love but I think you're just lazy, there's no excuse" (499)
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